"I hope everyone will allow themselves to be really crappy today, to walk away from being perfect. The real yoga isn't in the perfect pose; it's in the crappy pose that you are really feeling."

~the red-haired yoga teacher as quoted by Claire Dederer, author; Poser: my life in twenty-three yoga poses

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Love knows no religion

Some time between the year(s) 53-55 AD, the Apostle Paul was credited with writing the book of Corinthians.  One of the more well known passages from those writings is found in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

But long before Paul wrote these beautiful words defining love, which are often recited at Christian wedding ceremonies, there was Metta Sutta, thought to be written as early as 400 BC.  Metta, in its simplest terms is defined as loving kindness.  It is a meditation focused on the development of unconditional love for all beings.  Because of its practice of loving all beings, it is also known as universal love.  The word Metta is of Pali descent which is an Indic language, closely related to Sanskrit, in which the sacred texts of Theravada Buddhism are written. Some of my favorite concepts of Metta from the website Wildmind.org are:
  • Metta is empathy. It’s the willingness to see the world from another person's point of view: to walk a mile in another person’s shoes.
  • Metta is wishing others well.
  • Metta is friendliness, consideration, kindness, and generosity.
  • Metta is the basis for compassion. When our Metta meets someone suffering, then our Metta transforms into compassion.
  • Metta is the basis for shared joy. When our Metta meets with another person's happiness or good fortune, then it transforms into an empathetic joyfulness.
  • Metta is boundless. We can feel Metta for any being, regardless of gender, race, or nationality.
  • Metta is the most fulfilling emotional state that we can know.
  • It’s our inherent potential. To wish another well is to wish that they be in a state of experiencing Metta.
  • Metta is the answer to almost every problem the world faces today. Money won’t do it. Technology won’t do it. Metta, loving-kindness toward all beings, will.  

While Apostle Paul's words, "Love is patient, love is kind...." are undeniably true, so is the idea that if you project love into the universe, you will get love back.

Recently the fans of hip-hop/rap mogul Kanye West, blew up the twitter-verse praising Kanye for giving an older, unknown artist a big break by recording the song, Only One with him.  That “unknown” artist, actually known to millions of people over the age of 25, was none other than Sir Paul McCartney, a bit of a music mogul himself.  In 1969, SPM penned a song titled, The End, which appeared on the album, Abbey Road.  True to it's title, The End was the last song the Beatles ever recorded together.  In the song, the line, "Love you, love you" is repeated 12 times, but it is the last line of that song that has garnered the most attention over the course of the past 45 years, “And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”  

Universal Love.

And while the Beatles never recorded as a complete group again, John, Paul, George, and Ringo each continued to make music, both in solo careers and with other groups including one or two Silly Love Songs.

Released in 1971, the lyrics to Imagine suggest to me that John Lennon had a philosophy for love and peace all his own.  In a January 1981 interview with Playboy magazine, John Lennon stated, "I am no more a Buddhist, than I am a Christian..." I wonder if the fans of Kanye West have ever heard of John Lennon?


Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today...

Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions

I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

So whether you subscribe to the Biblical belief of love, the teachings of Buddha and the philosophy of Metta, Imagine the world according to John Lennon, or all of the above, I wish you a very Happy Valentine's Day filled with much loving-kindness and peace to all!  Be sure to take lots of love this week...as it it equal to the love you make

Friday, January 23, 2015

The Flavor of Yoga

Since the beginning of the New Year, there has been an influx of new students showing up to the mat.  Yea!  One of two things may be driving this:  My nagging is finally paying off...people are hauling their friends and neighbors to class to shut me the hell up OR a lot of people penciled in "try yoga" on their list of New Year's resolutions.  Either way, I'm a happy girl.  

More and more people are discovering the myriad of health benefits that having a regular yoga practice provides.  From managing stress and anxiety, to improving strength and flexibility to helping prevent cancer, the research and findings are vast, and as such the popularity of yoga is on the rise.

Are you one of those people that resolved to try yoga this year, but due to the multitude of choices, aren't sure where to go or what class to try?

Yoga is readily available at a many venues.  The first and most obvious being a studio.  Yoga studios usually offer the largest selection of classes on a daily basis, which makes it easier to find a class that works with our over-scheduled lives.  But having the convenience of schedule does not always come cheap.  The drop-in rate for a single class can easily be fifteen dollars or more depending on the size of the city in which you live. However, studios usually offer class packages or monthly memberships making the cost of yoga more affordable on a per class basis.

Many gyms and fitness centers offer yoga, in addition to several other group fitness classes as a benefit of membership.  This is a great way to sample yoga without making a large financial commitment to a studio.

Great yoga teachers can also be found teaching in church basements, community centers, in neighborhood clubhouses, and even at Lake Norman Taekwondo on Monday's at 10:15. (hint, hint!)  

If group fitness is not an option for you, many teachers offer private instruction or small group instruction.  The going rate is $50/hour and up, with an average of about $65/hour.  Again the price depends on the city in which you live and the experience of the teacher.

A good resource for finding classes near you is:  www.yogafinder.com.

Okay.  That handles the where, but what about the what?

If they can do it, you can do it!
Even if you have never tried yoga, even if you cannot bend and touch your toes, even if you are well into your retirement years, THERE IS A YOGA CLASS FOR YOU.  Look for a class titled:  Beginning yoga, Gentle yoga, Restorative yoga, Chair yoga or look for the words, "good for all levels" in the description.

On the flip side, even if you are a hard core athlete, even if you run marathons or do cross-fit, THERE IS A CLASS FOR YOU.  Look for a class titled:  Ashtanga, Vinyasa, Hot, or Power yoga if you want to lose five pounds in sweat every time you practice.  Or, look for a class titled:  Yin yoga if you want to go past the muscle, deep into the fascia as a complement to heavy weight training.

Last summer I sat amongst a group of women and listened as they chatted about their protein shakes and wheat germ diets.  The conversation quickly turned from diet to exercise as each proclaimed, "Yoga is soooo boring."  WHAT!?  Obviously they haven't been to the right class...for them, for their lifestyle, for their personality type.

Like Baskin Robbins with 31 Flavors, yoga types and styles are many.  If you try one flavor of yoga and it's not to your taste, don't spit it out and walk away.  Sample another flavor.  Because like ice cream, yoga is delicious once your discover the flavor you like best!

  • AcroYoga:  A combination of yoga and acrobatics that utilizes partners to perform various aerial yoga poses. 
  • Ashtanga:  A vigorous, athletic flowing style of yoga comprised of six different pre-determined sequences, which students progress through at their own pace.  Considered a pre-cursor to vinyasa and power yoga, it heavily influenced the way we practice yoga today.
  • Bikram:  The name Bikram was trademarked by living yoga master Bikram Choudhury.  It is a series of 26 yoga poses completed in a ninety minute period in a room heated to 104 degrees fahrenheit with 40% humidity.  The classes begin and end with a prescribed breathing technique and always follow the same sequence.
  • Hatha:  The term "hatha" encompasses all styles/lineages of yoga.  When you practice, Iyengar yoga, you are practicing Hatha yoga.  When you practice, Ashtanga yoga, you are practicing Hatha yoga.  When describing a class,  Hatha typically refers to a style of yoga  practiced where each of the poses are held for several breaths, rather than moving quickly from pose to pose.  For this reason, Hatha yoga is good for beginners.
  • Hot:  Any style of yoga performed in a heated space.  Bikram yoga is hot yoga, but hot yoga is not Bikram yoga.
  • Iyengar:  The focus of this style of yoga is precise alignment.  Its founder, B.K.S. Iyengar is credited with being the first person to utilize yoga props (straps, blocks, etc.) which are now commonplace in most yoga classes/studios.  Props are used to make yoga postures accessible to all body types and assist the practitioner in finding proper placement of joints and skeleton.
  • Jivamukti:  A physically intense practice where each class has a theme that is explored through yoga scripture, chanting, meditation, asana (poses), pranayama (breathwork) and music.
  • Kundalini:  Kundalini yoga is rich in tradition and ritual, with its' devotees often dressed in flowing, white (or light colored) apparel with their hair covered in a turbine-like dressing.  Kundalini sequences, called Kriyas, usually consist of rapid, repetitive movements performed in conjunction with a designated breathing method or holding a pose while breathing in a particular way.  It goes beyond the physical performance of poses with its emphasis on breathing, meditation, mudras and chanting. 
  • Restorative:  Relieves the effects of stress by alternately stimulating and relaxing the body to move toward balance.  Considered "active relaxation", this form of yoga relies heavily on the use of props, such as:  blankets, blocks, bolsters, and straps to put the practitioner into the pose and leave him/her for several minutes.
  •  Thai Yoga Massage:  Often dubbed "lazy man's yoga", TYM involves two people: a "giver" and a "receiver" whereby the "giver" performs yoga on the "receiver".  It is a healing art that utilizes Ayurvedic and Chinese medicine along with yoga and focuses on balancing the physical and energetic bodies of the "receiver" while following his/her breath.  This is a great option for people with very limited mobility including but not limited to practitioners with arthritis, multiple sclerosis, and paralysis just to name a few.
  • Vinyasa:  One of the most popular styles of yoga, Vinyasa simply means to flow from one pose into the next.  It is very similar to Ashtanga, but the sequences on not predetermined.  It can be found in varying degrees of difficulty and intensity depending on the teacher and/or studio.  Typically a more intense vinyasa will be labeled "power" yoga.
  • Yin: Most of the styles of yoga described above are yang in nature, meaning the practitioner is moving through a series of yoga poses (asana) and typically staying in the pose for 2-30 seconds.  Yin yoga incorporates approximately 25 poses, seated or reclined, and each pose is held for 2-10 minutes.   Yang yoga targets muscles where yin yoga targets fascia.  This is a popular choice with the cross-fit community.  

If you're in the Charlotte Metro area:  Mooresville, Cornelius, Huntersville, Statesville, Concord or Davidson and would like recommendations for a yoga teacher or studio, please feel free to contact me.   Through my yoga teacher training, I have met some of the best in the area and would be happy to make the connection.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Great Minds Think Alike

Hatred does not cease by hatred but only by love.  
This is the eternal rule. 

Darkness cannot drive out darkness only light can do that.  
Hate cannot drive out hate only love can do that. 
~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Sunday, January 11, 2015

A Winning Attitude

Today I sat for several hours in an over-crowded school cafeteria patiently waiting while Child Numero Uno auditioned for the all-District Honor Band.   I am no stranger to sitting and waiting.  I'm a parent.  It's what I do.   This is not even my first time at this venue.  I've visited this cafeteria with its cold, over-priced pizza for the past three years.  And you know what?   I don't mind cold, over-priced pizza.  In fact, I rather like it.  It symbolizes my child's willingness to try...to put himself in the path of failure, and for that I am extremely proud.  In Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, the author Amy Chua states in part, "...the only activities your children should be permitted to do are those which they can eventually win a medal; and that medal must be gold."*

Clearly, I am no tiger mom.

And while he's had some success(es), this event is not one of them.  With 17 counties in the district and only two tenor saxophones chosen each year, the odds are stacked against him.  But still he tries. And still I'm proud.

Like Ms. Chua, you may believe my attitude is the parental justification of a child with a track record for failure, but can you imagine where we'd be if everyone who tried and failed, just simply quit trying?

Did you know that Michael Jordan, easily considered one of the best basketball players of all time, was actually cut from his high school basketball team?

What if J.K. Rowling had given up after her fifteenth rejection letter?  Can you imagine a world without the infamous boy wizard and his lightning bolt, shaped scar?

Or that for every home run Babe Ruth hit, he struck out twice?  When asked about this he simply said, "Every strike brings me closer to the next home run."

I couldn't agree more.  If we quit trying, we are certain to never succeed.

I haven't always had such a positive perspective about failure, but practicing yoga has taught me a few things beyond downward facing dog.  For example, it has taught me to be present; to live for today, to let go of yesterday, to not agonize about the future.  In doing so, I am able to shed my ego.  If I fail today, tomorrow will bring a fresh opportunity to try again.

You will often hear a yoga teacher touting:  Be. Here. Now.  It's not just a mantra, it's a way of life.  That's not to say I don't have moments of self-doubt.  I do.  But yoga empowers me to acknowledge those feelings and accept them.  Once I accept them, I can let them go, and the best way to do that is to come to the mat and breathe.

As of this writing, I still don't know whether or not Child Numero Uno has been chosen to participate in the all-District Honor Band this year.  Maybe this third attempt will be the one that puts him on the team. What I do know however, with 100% certainty, is that he definitely won't make it, if he doesn't try.

"You create your own universe as you go along"
~Winston Churchill, Nobel peace prize winner, twice elected Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, failed sixth-grade on his first attempt.

*As a side note, I want to clarify that when I read, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, I loved it!  I only used a small snippet to prove a point in this post.  Overall, it was well-written, self-deprecating, and in the end the author experiences personal growth through the struggles she encounters with her rebellious younger daughter who prefers playing tennis to playing the violin.  Gasp!

Friday, January 2, 2015

Chewy Coconut Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

I have a confession to make:  I am not a vegan or even a vegetarian.  I am not gluten-free, nor am I an avid consumer of organic-only products.  But a lot of my yogi (and non-yogi) friends are.  And therefore, when confronted with, "How do I show my love and appreciation to them during this holiday season?"  I decided to bake them cookies; not your average Christmas cookie, but a chewy coconut oatmeal raisin cookie made with only organic ingredients.

As a non-organic, non-gluten-free carnivore, some of the ingredients were completely foreign to me, but I was able to source all of them at either Whole Foods or Walmart.  Yes, Walmart!  They actually have a large selection of organic products in their baking aisle.


Chewy Coconut Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

Servings:  48
Preparation time:  30 minutes

  • 1 cup coconut oil, softened
  • 1 cup organic whole sugar
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 2 organic soy-free eggs
  • 2 cups rolled oats
  • 2 cups almond flour*
  • 2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 2 scant teaspoons Himalayan pink salt
  • 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
  • 1 cup golden raisins
  • 2 cups dried, unsweetened coconut flakes
  • 1 cup pecans, chopped
  • 5-6 tablespoons water, as needed* 

Uncooked, golf-ball shaped cookies, pre-flattened

1.       Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
2.       Line cookie sheet(s) with parchment paper.
3.       Cream coconut oil and sugar in a large bowl, add eggs and vanilla.  Set aside.
4.       In a separate bowl, mix the oats, almond flour, baking soda and salt.
5.       Stir the wet and dry together, then add cinnamon, raisins, coconut, and pecans.
6.       Roll into golf ball sized cookies and flatten***   Space approximately 1” apart.
7.       Bake 8-12 minutes until cookies are golden and fragrant.
8.       Let stand to cool.

*You can grind your own almond flour by placing whole almonds into a blender or food processor until a fine meal is produced.

*You can substitute almond flour for coconut flour.  I used 1 cup of almond flour and 1 cup of coconut flour. 

**If mixture is too dry to combine, add water until it sticks together.

Finished and fragrant!

I have another confession to make:  I'm not usually a fan of oatmeal raisin cookies, but these were delicious!  I ate way more than I should have, and while they are gluten-free, they are not calorie free!  Enjoy!

Friday, November 28, 2014

The benefits of being a child.

Accept all that is with an open heart.
The more grateful you are,
the more life with bring.

Balasana is another key pose in all yoga practices regardless of the style of yoga being performed.  Balasana also called Child's Pose is one of the most common resting postures.  Anytime during your practice, when you find it necessary to re-connect with your breath, you are invited to take Child's Pose.  Please do not feel it necessary for your teacher to instruct you into the pose. 

  • Gently stretches lower back, hips, thighs, knees, and ankles.
  • Relaxes spine, shoulders, and neck.
  • Calms the mind, reducing tension and stress.
  • Alleviates headaches by increasing blood circulation to the head.

  • From Table position, bring your knees and feet together and then sink your hips to your feet.
  • Fold your torso over your thighs and rest your forehead on the floor.
  • Rest your arms along your sides.  Palms are face up near your feet.
  • Completely relax your head and shoulders.

  • If you feel tight, try separating your knees hip-width apart while big toes continue to touch.  This will give you more space in your chest.
  • If your hips don't reach your feet, you can place a rolled-up blanket, mat, or bolster between your heels and your hamstrings.
  • If your forehead doesn't reach the mat, place a block to bring the ground closer to you.
Play around with this pose.  Some people prefer to keep their arms extended in front of them, some prefer their hands back by their feet.  Find what's comfortable for you; where you can relax and re-gain control of your breath.

One reason I believe we find Balasana to be such a soothing force of nature is because it is ingrained in our body's muscle memory.  Whether you realize it or not, you've been performing Balasana since before you were born. 


No matter what modification(s) you choose for your child's pose:  knees together or apart, hands by your feet or extended in front of you, it is important to rest your forehead either on the mat or a block in order to stimulate your parasympathetic nervous system.

The parasympathetic nervous system is part of the autonomic nervous system, which is responsible for regulating a variety of body functions:  heart rate, breathing, sweating, and digestion.  It works in conjunction with the sympathetic nervous system.  The sympathetic nervous system provides quick responses to immediate needs and is often referred to as our "fight or flight," response.  On the opposite end of the spectrum lies the parasympathetic nervous system.  The parasympathetic nervous system helps to slow the body's reaction, thus allowing for less urgent processes to occur, often referred to our "rest or digest" response.


It wasn't until I was fully engulfed in yoga teacher training that I even knew a pose called Balasana existed.  Crazy...considering I just told you this is a key pose in all yoga practices, right!?  But it's true. Over the course of several years, at least a hundred classes, and multiple teachers, never once did I hear the right pronunciation of the pose.  I always heard Valasana...with a V!  I finally discovered the correct name for Child's Pose when I was reading a book that kept referencing Balasana.  Imagine my shock, when I googled this pose I'd never heard of and Child's Pose appeared.

But regardless if you call it Balasana or Valasana, be comfortable in Child's Pose and always remember it's your practice, not your neighbor's practice or your instructor's practice.  Yours and yours alone.  Happy resting!

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Shanghai'd Thanksgiving

I originally wrote the following article in 2007 after a disastrous first Thanksgiving spent living abroad.  It was later published in an anthology titled Thanksgiving Tales: True Stories of the Holiday in America.
Three years into our expat assignment, I finally realized Thanksgiving is not about the food being served, it's about the people you spend the day with.   
Today we are back on U.S. soil, but still far from home.  I feel particularly grateful for the community we've cultivated over the past couple of years. In Sanskrit, the word Kula has several meanings: herd, flock, clan, tribe, family, habitat, gang, which when pared down all mean "community". Tomorrow, we will celebrate Thanksgiving with our Kula.  Fortunately for all involved, I am not responsible for cooking the turkey this year! 


It had been just three months since we boarded a plane bound for China, and transitioning to life in Shanghai was going much smoother than anticipated.  It wasn't until confronted with the impending arrival of Thanksgiving, a truly traditional American holiday, I realized just how far from home we were. 

For me, Thanksgiving meant spending the day with family, eating and eating and eating until it became imperative to change into pants with an elastic waistband.  I was determined to re-create that tradition with my own children, but in order to accomplish this, I first needed to find a turkey.  Without a turkey, Thanksgiving might as well be on a Tuesday in July.  It cannot be celebrated without a turkey.  Period.

In November in the United States, turkey is not only plentiful but cheap.  Many stores offer promotions, and if taken advantage of, the turkey is easily the least expensive item on the menu--not so in China.  Turkey, being indigenous to North and South America, are neither wild nor farmed in any part of Asia.  And although there are 19 million people in Shanghai, only a select group of expatriates want to eat them...and only once a year.  Therefore, the average 15-pound gobbler will set you back approximately $100 U.S. dollars.

In addition to the requisite turkey, the menu also included mashed potatoes and gravy, rolls, corn, fresh vegetables with dip, and Jell-O.  Despite the simplicity of the ingredients, finding them required scouring five different stores over three days and cost a small fortune.  But I did it!  I found everything I needed, including the myriad of spices to make brine, which was sure to be the one thing that brought the simple bill of fare to five-star restaurant status.

Thanksgiving Day, after consulting with both Betty Crocker and Butterball.com, I determined the bird would take approximately four hours to cook at a temperature of about 350 degrees.  I carefully converted Fahrenheit to Centrigrade and decided to set the oven at 170 degrees.

While the oven was warming, my husband pulled the bird from the brine, which had been soaking up the lovely, savory flavors overnight, only to discover the pan I'd purchased was too small.  It was like trying to squeeze a size ten foot into a strappy, little size seven shoe.  It just wasn't going to work. 

In my shopping excursions that week, I noticed some of the stores stocked with disposable pans.  I crossed my fingers as I ran on foot to the closest little market.  I was in luck.  Covered in dust and tucked away on a back shelf, they had just one.  I snatched it up and ran home.

We were now ready to throw the main course into the gas chamber, but the new pan was too big for the tiny oven.  After performing a little origami fused with some karate chops on the cheap aluminum, the pan fit.

With the turkey safely roasting, I took the kids to the park for the afternoon.  When I returned, I started peeling the potatoes.  By my estimation, the bird would be done in 30 minutes.  I opened the oven door to check its progress. NO FLAME.  At some point during the day, the gas had blown out and while the temperature in the oven dropped, the tension in the kitchen soared. 

We had no idea how long the turkey had not been roasting, and this particular bird had no plastic indicator to let us know when it was time to carve, so we did the next best thing and stuck a thermometer in it.  My husband punctured the breast and watched while the temperature gauge rose.

"According to Betty, the thermometer is supposed to go in the thigh," I informed him after consulting the red and white checkered cookbook.

"Where's the thigh?" he replied.

"I'm not exactly sure," I said, "but I know that's not it."

He left the thermometer in the breast and we watched as it climbed to 130 degrees Fahrenheit.  The kids were starting to moan and groan.  They were "staaaarving."  So I presented them with veggies and dip and we started to snack while we waited another estimated hour for the bird to reach a safe temperature to eat.

When the thermometer started to beep, indicating the turkey had reached temperature, I began to set the table.  While my husband whipped the mashed potatoes into creamy goodness and heated the corn, he snuck a bite of a dinner roll...and then promptly spit it out.  The rolls were filled with sweet cream and raisins.  We'd spent several hours the day before going from one bakery to the next in search of anything that resembled a dinner roll.  The little surprise inside of these was unexpected and unappreciated.

I remembered seeing a French baguette at the store earlier, so I put on my running shoes and sprinted there a second time.  Again, I felt very lucky.  No one else had purchased the single loaf of bread on the shelf.  I paid for it and raced back home.

Finally we were ready to eat.  The table was set, the candles were lit, and we said our prayers of thanksgiving.  Just as we were about to carve the turkey, in the the flicker of the candlelight, I noticed a lot of juice on the platter.  I jumped out of my seat and threw on the lights...BLOOD!  The entire ambiance was ruined as the bird was not even close to being edible.  Frustrated, my husband cut the gobbler wide open and put it back in the oven at 400 degrees Fahrenheit.  He sliced off a large piece of breast meat, nuked it,  and sat down to eat.  I fed the kids Jell-O while I waited for the turkey to finish roasting.  At 8 p.m., I opened the oven door to check on the bird.  NO FLAME!

After eight hours of failed attempts to roast the perfect turkey, I surrendered.  I put everything away, did the dishes, and bathed the kids.  Once they were safely tucked into bed, I broke out the Pop Tarts.

Happy Thanksgiving to me!

Our third Thanksgiving in China, there was not a turkey in sight, just great friends and lots of laughs.  I was wrong.  While eating turkey is a nice addition to the holiday, it is ultimately who you spend the day with that matters most---not what's on the menu.